Wednesday, January 26, 2011

My body...we have a, well just hate relationship!!

I can't even say love/hate. It's just hate.
Reasons...
1. I can't lose weight. I know what you are all thinking. I must be doing something wrong.
  I exercise everyday. Some days for 90 minutes(running, swimming, spinning and so on).
   I eat 1500 calories and do no sugar. Ok so I do drink diet coke but also drink tons of water.
2. I have ovaries that hate me and the world around me. They are trying to punish me. Don't know why I havewhat is called polycystic ovarian disease.
3. I don't sleep well. I am always tired in the morning. ALWAYS.
4. I have a broken ankle that I run, swim and spin with. It hates me also.
5. Shin splints-they hate me.

I finally saved enough money to get a bodybugg. Its like walking around with monitors that calculate everything you do. It said I should have lost 3-4 lbs my first week according to my excess calorie burn. I gained a pound.  It confirmed to me that I am not crazy. Something is just so wrong.

So while a few of these things are self induced, some are not. BUT, I think for the first time in YEARS...like 20 I may have ideas of what is wrong with me.
My lovely husband who is a pre-med student, and ususally makes me batty with all his diagnosing, was learning about a new disease and its like it all fell in his lap.
I am going to have testing done for Cushing's Syndrome. It all makes so much sense and would explain everything if I do have it.
The down side. It would mean I have a tumor on my pituitary gland and need Chemo, radiation, or surgery.  While I pray I don't have the tumor and I don't need to do any of the previous things mentioned, I would also love to finally know why I am the way I am. Which is the lesser of 2 evils I guess?

Monday, January 10, 2011

A ride home....

Tonight was an interesting night for me. I did my usual swap the kids in a parking lot with Sam, all whining and crying. The mom guilt of wishing they were home playing instead of getting hauled around cause of our busy schedule. I was having that "what am I doing?" feeling. Like running in circles.
I sat in class feeling soooo tired and worn down. I hopped up to take my first client. You know the perky girl working it for big tips. ;)
I'm going through all the motions and just ready to be done and go to bed. I find out a girl at school doesn't have a ride home. Do I want to do it? No. It's already 10 pm and she is still working on someone. I'm getting grumpy and really want to go home but keep on a happy face. Finally leave school at 10:30 and drive her home. We start to talk. I don't know this girl all that well. Something made her start to talk and tell me how she feels lost and wants to be active in church again and feel like she belongs. I start to talk with her and answer her questions and tell her how things happened for me and the way I made the decision to live my life the way I am.
I don't think she realized it, but man, did I need that conversation.
I have nothing to complain about. There are some people out there that are so lost and have no idea how to make it better. I may not have money, or fancy things, or even an ipod for pete sakes. BUT I AM HAPPY! I know who I am and know where I am going. That's more than I think a lot of people have. I am truly blessed.
Who knew beauty school could be so deep?

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Oh, Henry!!!

Me~Henry, what do you need to do if you pee on the seat?


Henry~Wipe it off. But it wasnt me....It was Sophie.

Me~Sophie doesn't pee on the seat. She's a girl.

Henry~yeah huh, she's crazy.

Me~Henry, girl's do NOT pee on the seat.

Henry~gguuhhh, fine it was me. But just this time. It's usually Sophie.
 
Round 2
Henry~Mom, There is a booger in my hair and pretty sure it's not mine.
Me~How do you know?
Henry~I didn't pick my nose today.
 
Don't worry it was silly putty.